Love

People try to explaIn it, to research it, write books about it, poams, articles etc. But nothing can really make you understand what unconditional love is.
The kind you feel when your child is lying on your chest, sleeping and making little sweet sounds. The kind that makes you kiss him even when you're really tired, even when your body hurts from feeding him. The kind that makes you worried, every hour of the day, worried that he's doing well, breathing and feels good. The kind that makes you so unusually happy just looking into his big wide open curious eyes.

People say that kids are happiness (in Hebrew at least). At this point I do see what they mean.

Mother

I am.

For the past 10 days I am a mother.

My son came to the world 10 days earlier than the estimated date. It was a quick birth, but was a surprising one, coz it was only in the last minute that the midwives realized that the baby is not coming to this world with his head first.... We had a lot of luck, and it all went well, and we both were fine and went home 4 hours after he was born. Going home right after it was amazing. There's nothing better than relaxing in your own bed, learning every detail of your new baby's features.

It's an amazing feeling to see this little man growing every day, just little by little. Looking into his eyes, and catching his glimpse, realizing that every day he looks with a bit more focus, and a bit more interest. Realizing that he can already recognize my voice, and his fathers, and that he relaxes just to the sound of it. Realizing that he's totally dependent on us,  and almost totally dependent on me- for food. Realizing that he might sleep well in his bed next to us, but when he wakes up- there's nothing more comforting for him than to sleep right next to us on our bed.

I will probably write* more about this interesting experience of becoming a parent,

for now that's it

just wanted to update.

*thanks L for pointing that out! LOL

Pregnant thoughts

1. Women will tell you that it looks like you've swallowed a watermelon. Men would say it looks like you have a basketball in your belly.
2. Things that fall on the floor were dropped there by the devil himself. Bending over when you have a watermelon (or basketball) in your belly is hell.
3. Watching the baby's kicks from the outside is even funnier and more exciting than feeling it from the inside. Imagine your belly moving in waves with sudden changes in it's size in certain places.
4. Being pregnant is a preparation for being a parent: you're tired ALL the time, you can't eat much (the space time continuum: now there's no space, when you're a parent- there's no time), you have a responsibility on the child's health, it prevents you from doing things you were used to (doing sports, going out late etc.).
5. 9 full months feels like FOREVER. At some point you forget the times you weren't pregnant.
6. Pregnancy stupidity can be funny at times, and can be embarrassing at others. Funny- when you realize that you've spent an hour looking online for the same wool you got for the the baby's blanket you're knitting, coz you think you don't have enough of it. Then you realize you have double the amount you thought (who would have thought to just count the rolls of wool that are lying right next to you in a plastic bag?!). Embarrassing - when you use the wrong terms in German, making the meaning of a sentence totally change, when chatting on Skype to fellow students, who don't even know you're pregnant.
7. The younger the baby in a stroller is- the nicer his or her mother would smile at you when seeing your big pregnant belly.
8. The bigger your belly is, the sadder the seller at a furniture store will look at you, when you ask "how long will it take to deliver?"
9. There are more baby stores online in Germany than online supermarkets that deliver. Although Germany definitely doesn't have a high birth rate.
10. You can guess in what part of town you are, according to the amount of fancy strollers you see in the streets.

Changes

I hope that this post will be one out of many posts I write in the near future. Now, I have some more time.

Yesterday was my last day at work. Why? Because in Germany mothers have the luxury of staying at home starting from 6 weeks before the due date. This is a real blessing, since I am still studying at the open university (I think I forgot to mention here that I got a very good grade on my essay last semester :-)), and since with every day of pregnancy it gets harder and harder to rush to work and stay efficient there...

I must say, I have no clue how women in Israel work till the last day before they give birth. I'm only in the middle of the eighth month, and already feel how heavy it is and how complicated it is to move from one place to another. So as it sounds- I'm glad to have this chance to stay home now, focus on my studies and above all- focus on what's good for my body and for the baby. I guess it won't take long before I start nesting and taking care of everything for the little baby we're expecting. It's really exciting.

I have tons of little tasks I want to take care of, knowing that later I won't have time for. Like arranging the photo album from Argentina, finishing to knit my scarf, and starting to knit a nice blanket for the baby. I want to go over my closet and throw everything I haven't used in the last year or two, and I want to start reading more about the birth, although we just finished a preparation course for couples at the birth center I want to give birth in.

My mom is coming to be here for a month - she scheduled her flight for a week before the due date. In the beginning I thought it might be a long time- but with time and after a few talks with her, trying to be as open and honest as I can- I realized that she's really only coming to help us. We will just have to continue being honest with each other, telling one another exactly what we expect.

I'm quite excited about these first few weeks that we'll become a family, and I want it to stay our experience as a couple plus one as much as possible. I think it's important for the future.

So, hoping this is not the last post in a while,

have a good weekend everyone!

Growing

So this post will be one that will be a compensation for all these days that I haven't written a word...

First I'll start with saying that it's so obvious that I come here to write as soon as I have some work to do for Uni. I keep looking for escape :-) I have an essay to hand in, and I have another 3 weeks or so to finish writing it. I've only read some literature so far and found some articles. So let's hope that I actually get to write this assay. I need to write 15 pages in German. Wish me luck.

Other than that, we had some nice activities lately, for example we went on a weekend with Rob's family, a bicycle tour that was dedicated to Rob's dad, who loves riding his bike. It was a birthday present from all the kids. I, of course, lazy me, didn't ride the bicycle, but I was in charge of the picnic car, so I met the happy family on the way each day bringing them some food. I also had all their belongings in the car- since we slept in 2 different hotels that weekend. It was a really beautiful weekend, I took amazing pictures, and it was honestly fun driving alone in this absolutely inspiring scenery. It was in the area of Stuttgart,  in the Swabian Alb. I really recommend  going there if you have the chance.

Other than that- I just had a tooth pulled out, one of my lower wisdom teeth, which has been there since I'm 18, so it was really hard to let go. I'm still recovering, but I didn't suffer from much pain since they took it out, so I guess I was lucky there. But the whole procedure was a bit complicated because........ well....... because...........


I'm pregnant :-)

yep.

And that's one of the reasons I haven't written here in a while. The first 3 months were horrible. I had sickness throughout the day, and lost 4kg just because of that. The last month was much better. I'm starting my fifth soon, and I feel ok.

Anyway, I wonder who of you is reading this and will now know the news. My Israeli friends all know already, but you guys around the world - I haven't had the chance to tell you, and was actually wondering if I should even write it here on the Blog or not. I decided that I should, I mean, at some point I would have written that I have a baby, and that would have been even funnier no?

Now I just hope and wish for, as they say, a "boring" pregnancy, and a healthy baby!

That's it for now, told you this will compensate for a long time not writing...

Paradox

It's a really beautiful weekend. The weather is amazing. Especially after a month of rain and gray and cold weather. The sun is shining now, and it's getting warmer by the hour.

But I'm alone this weekend.

Rob went to Budapest for a stagdu of a friend that is getting married in August. I must admit, except for the fact that I'm spending this weekend alone in Munich, I'm jealous of him for being there with friends and having fun. I've never been there.

Sometimes it feels lonely, but not in the sense of being alone with yourself, rather not having anyone to do anything with. I've tried calling friends from here, but because I didn't want to make plans in advance (wasn't sure how I'd be feeling this weekend), I'm stuck.

Germans need to plan everything in advance. Being spontaneous is not really their thing. I really miss that about Israel. There I could have had plenty of plans made in the last minute. Just call a friend, and if their available you can join them in whatever they're doing.

I've asked one of my colleagues at work, the one I like most and get along with the most, what she's doing this weekend. I've mentioned that I have nothing to do... She told me what she's doing and didn't even think about asking me if I want to join. I know it's not personal, but it is quite annoying to always feel like a 3rd wheel, so I just didn't ask if I can join. Just didn't feel comfortable.  That's Germany, and maybe also other places in Europe. People won't just invite you to do something with them. Even if you like each other and even meet sometimes outside of the work place.

So I'll try to do some things at home that I've planned on doing, like cleaning up a bit, washing the dishes, doing the laundry. Maybe start my new assignment for uni. I might take myself and some study books and go outside somewhere in the sun and read.

*sigh*

Remind me next time when Rob makes plans to go for a long weekend somewhere- to make my own plans. I should have gone somewhere too.

Resting in the holy land

I haven't written in a long time.
There are a few reasons for that.
The first reason will be revealed some other time, I promise.
The second reason is my studying.
I've started studying for my masters course, at the open university of Germany, and next to reading a lot in German, I needed to hand in an assay today.
I actually needed to hand in two assays but the first reason for not writing kind of stopped me from doing that as well.
So, as understood from the title, I'm in Israel now, already almost 10 days, and I really enjoy it here. The only minus is that Rob isn't with me this time. Other than that- I would have stayed here much longer, if I could. The weather is really nice, not too warm and not too cold, my friends are really nice and I get to meet them (between one uni assignment to another), and in general, I really rest here and do absolutely nothing special, which is the perfect holiday. Thinking about going back to work in 2 days makes me really upset.
I'm in Haifa now, but going to Tel-Aviv this afternoon, going to see my brothers once more, and tomorrow mom is coming to TLV to spend the day with me and my sister. And then my nice holiday will be over.
Anyway, that's basically what's going on with me nowadays, I promise to write a bit more when I can and when I have the muse to write.
Have a nice weekend you all (especially whoever has Pentecost holidays)!

Numbers

here are a few facts in numbers, about me:

2.5 was my age when we moved to the states
5 was my age when we moved back to Israel
10 is the amount of apartments / houses I've lived in till now
6 are the years that I spent in the scouts
21 months was the amount of time I served in the Israeli army as a guide
10 is the number of different jobs I had since I was 14 till now
5 is the number of languages I've learned in my life, from which:
3 is the number of languages I speak fluently
4 the amount of siblings I have, 1 sister and 3 half brothers
17 was my age when my parents split up
3 years of my life were spent studying for my B.A in Psychology and Communications
2 is the amount of pets I had, 1 cat (Toffi who got run over by our mean neighbors) and 1 dog (RIP Uggi who died at the age of 17)
22 is the estimated amount of pairs of shoes I have
24, almost 25, was my age when I met my husband for the very first time
18 is the amount of countries that I actually remember visiting (not including the countries my parents took me to as a really small kid)

Now I urge you to make a similar list :-) and I'll start with tagging Liat

Happiness is a warm gun

I guess that I thought about the word "happiness" coz I don't really feel so happy now. Then the first song that came into my mind was this one.

It's funny. I wrote the last post about work in Germany and in Israel, coz I've started questioning my work place. Our conditions there keep getting worse. It happens very very slowly, so I can't really say that it's all so bad. But if you compare it to what it was about a year ago, and to other jobs, it's not that great.
I don't really want to go into details about it here, but I just wanted to write that my job is a bit annoying at the moment, and that I wish I had the language to just say "fuck it!" and go look for a new one. In today's situation, I can't do it. Not yet. First I need to realize where we're going to live in the next few years, what I want to do with my life and so on. Till then, I'm kinda stuck in this job.
It makes me a bit miserable, but I guess that I'll just have to cope... Maybe starting to study again now will help. I sure hope so.
So... till then, enjoy the Beatles. I'm home, trying to not let the strong winds banging on our crappy windows bother me. And that wasn't just a metaphor.
Have a nice weekend everyone, I'll be working tomorrow :-(

working in Germany vs. working in Israel

I started writing this post at work, when I had a couple of minutes for myself (something that didn't really happen lately, since we're under staffed and it seems like we're working much harder than before...).
I will try to compare my working experience in Israel with the one in Germany, as well as comparing working with Germans vs. working with Israelis...

1. Payment:
Although living expenses are not much higher in Germany than in Israel (in average of course), the salary in Germany is much higher. In Israel, for example, I got about half as much as I'm getting now per hour, for the same job (in the same company). Oh, and what I'm getting now is lower than the average salary for this type of job in Germany.
On the other hand there is no minimum wage law in Germany, which leads to a lot of jobs that pay very little (especially students' jobs, what they call here "under 400€ jobs" - coz this amount is the amount ppl don't have to pay taxes for).

2. Holidays:
In Israel it works like in the USA: the law says that one should get a minimum of one day off per month, for a full time job. Therefore, most ppl have 12 days a year, that they can take off (not including the bank holidays of course). In certain cases, governmental offices give more days off every year of working, up to a certain maximum of course. My mother, who's been working for the same gov. office for more than 20 years now, has about 24 days a year, to take as holiday when she wants. Remember this number.
In Germany it's a bit different. The law is a bit more complicated. It basically says that the minimum of days off one should get is 1 and a half days per month of the year (that's the absolute minimum). That makes 18 days a year. It also says that for a normal 5 day week, one is entitled to at least 20 days off a year.
I got here 24 days off the first year that I worked here. Remember this number? Every year I get one day more till I'll reach 30 days.
I'm much younger than my mom, have much less work experience, and still have more days off a year than she does.
How does this effect one's life? In many, many ways.
Obviously, the more days off payed by your company, the more days you have to relax and go on vacation, meaning, doing everything else but working. Knowing that you have these days, and actually using them, makes you, as a worker, much happier, and of course much more satisfied in your job. It also allows ppl to have a life next to work. Helps develop hobbies, helps make ppl a bit more interesting and interested.
This brings me to the next point:

3. Working hours:
I only have experience working for this one company in Germany, but I do look around me, my husband works in a German company, and I have friends around. Here, although it's starting to change to the worst a bit, ppl work for money and for living, not the other way around. They go to work, most of them start around 8, they have lunch together, have a real break, and then they go home around 17:00. They have hobbies, do sports, take care of pets, or spend some time with their families.

In Israel I had a totally different experience.
Ppl are slaves to the job, answer phone calls on their cell phones at all hours, even if it's at 20:00 at home, whilst tucking your kid to bed. There are no borders about these things or limits, it's all Kosher.

I'm making a huge generalization here, I'm very well aware of the fact that there are both kinds of working ppl in Germany and Israel, but that's the big picture.




These were all just thoughts of mine lately at work, I must say that it's not all bad working in Israel. for example: ppl there are much more flexible, much much much more open to new ideas, and give you much more freedom in choosing your path, weather it's inside a company, or when hiring you. In Germany ppl are scared to death from "holes" in their CV (for example a year of traveling etc.). They are so afraid of that they never dare to go outside of the "path", of the "box". They try doing everything by the book, otherwise, they wont even be invited to the next interview. I miss being a bit more creative, having a bit more say about little things that make a difference. I miss the flexibility of the ppl, and their open mindedness.
Yeah, it seems as if in Germany ppl don't judge you for who you are or what you did (when you compare German reactions to stories with Israeli ones), but that's only coz the Germans would just not tell you their opinions right away. Inside, they would think: wow, she's too old for this job, and what a waste of time was her traveling around the world working here and there, and she doesn't have a diploma we know, how weird, we can't afford to take a chance on a person like that.

and yes, again, I know that I'm generalizing everything, but- these are just my impressions and experiences... I really hope that life would surprise me and show me how different things can be here :-)

Winter Wonderland

The winter here this year is a real nice winter. It actually snowed so much that the streets are white for the past month or so (on and of with some rain sometimes, but basically snowy most of the time). I really like it.
There's nothing like the cleanliness of the snow. So pure. Makes the streets so quiet and calm.
The muddy snow that is left over after it melts a bit, isn't as nice, but as long as the temperatures stay under zero, it still looks like whipped cream that is covering everything. Like frosting on a cake.
We went skiing a few times already, once in the middle of the week and once for a weekend in Austria at Rob's grandma's. It was so much fun, I get better and enjoy it more and more every time. It's also really good sports.

Here are a few pics from the first time we went skiing this season:

that's me! look how amazing the view is

me next to a snow blower
(which is probably out of work this winter)

more amazing views.

It's so nice to ski down the hill and stop sometimes just for a quick look at the view. You breath in, breath out, and just enjoy that moment, that specific moment.
Skiing, you don't thing about anything. Your mind is a total blank. You just think about this moment you live- this second you need to ski down and look around and make sure you come down safe. You think about the white snow, the nice weather (when it's nice) and the bad weather (when it sucks). You think about the next turn you'll take, and then the next slope you'll choose. You think about your body, you think about the view, you think about today and now. Nothing else. It's so liberating. You feel so free of all the things that usually tie you down.

I feel the same doing Yoga sometimes, but not for such a long intensive time. Doing Yoga I can be relaxed and think about nothing else, for maybe half an hour. Skiing- you think about nothing else- for the whole day.

***

I got a flight ticket to Israel in May- going alone this time, and can't wait to be there- with no plans but to see my family and friends! only 3 months to go.

That's it for now, going to bed, really tired after a weekend of skiing and a day of work,
will try to write again soon!

Argentina part V and last

Last thing I wrote was about the Peninsula Valdez. We drove there in the morning, and first of all went to get a room in the only town on it. So we got a room and headed to the dirt roads that we "love" so much in Argentina. We drove all day on the peninsula and saw all kinds of animals, like sea lions and sea elephants, penguins and other birds, sheep, an armadillo (which ran to us and tried eating our food!) capybaras running away from us on the road to the field, big guanacos also- crossing our way running so elegantly and more. We finished our round on the half island and went to the town where we slept. We had really good sea food for dinner, and a nice walk in sundown on the beach. It was really quiet and calm.
The next day we drove back to Puerto Madryn and tried to take advantage of the day. I must say that I don't really remember what we did that day :-) I guess that we just relaxed. I remember meeting a nice Argentine girl in the hostel, who was traveling alone. We had a chat over lunch.
From there we took a flight back to Buenos Aires, for a few last days in Argentina, in which we ate a lot of really good steak (got really good tips from a friend who lived there a couple of years ago), I especially recommend the restaurant La Cabrera, which makes steaks to almost gourmet food (their side dishes that come with the meal are amazing and the meat itself was the best we had in Argentina). We also shopped and bought some nice stuff for both of us (I could stay there and shop till I drop, but you know... my bank account is not unlimited... sadly!) There are such nice and original things in Buenos Aires. They really have nice taste in clothes, very individual but still stylish and up to date. It is really fun walking through the nice stores in Palermo, and browsing through the Argentine designers shops.
We enjoyed our last days there a lot, just a shame that on the last day our hostel experienced an exploded water pipe, which resulted in no water for more then 24 hours. we were sent to take a shower in their other branch 10 min walk away. But never mind. We felt as if it's a sign for us to leave, to make us a bit less sad that we have to go back home, from lovely summer to winter...

Argentina is a great place to go visit. It's different landscapes, it's amazingly nice people, it's really nice food, it's great shopping and huge variety of things to do that can fit just about any tourist... It's really a dream... Highly recommended!!!

I'll see how I put pictures, whether I just add some to the posts I wrote or give a link to an album.

That's it about Argentina, I still want to write a post of thoughts about it at some point, but not right now.

Argentina part IV

So... where was I? I think we were on that Peninsula for a hike. Walking to the end of it was really nice. It´s 13km, that took us a bit less than 3 hours. We had a nice picnic in a nice quiet little place, and then headed back. On the way back, after about 2km of walking I realized that my hiking boots give me really bad blisters... the way back took about the same as the way there, although most was down hill. I got really bad blisters, that Rob had to pop open so I could even walk on my feet. But the next day we mostly drove, only walked a bit to see a cool glacier (black one), and so my feet heeled a bit.
We drove to a town called El Bolson, a small town in Patagonia, that is known for being a hippy town, but to me looked more touristic than cool. non the less it was really nice there. We did a short hike the next day, in the woods. After a while the scenerey all looks the same, and although it´s still really beautiful, we were really ready for a change. Luckily we were going back to Bariloche (were I wrote the last post), and took a night bus to Puerto Madryn, a small town on the Atlantic. It´s nice to be next to the beach :-)
Tomorrow we´ll be driving around the Peninsula Valdez, where we´re supposed to be able to see all kinds of animals. But I´ll tell you about it afterwards!

till then I´ll be enjoying the sun and the warm weather!!!

Argentina part III

Where was I? I can´t remember when was the last time I posted, or rather, I can´t remember where I was the last time I posted something. Was I in Cordoba? Oh, yeah, we just arrived to Mendoza from Cordoba. So I can tell you a bit about Mendoza and the Andes, and then about what we´ve done in the last week.

Mendoza is a tricky city. It´s not the nicest one, but around it there´s a lot to do. We got there on new year´s eve, and in the evening we tried to find a nice restaurant to have dinner in, but since the Argentines, just like the Spanish, eat dinner on that evening with their families and then, after midnight, go out and party all night, there was maybe one restaurant open where we could eat. So we ate and then wondered the very empty streets of town, and then sat in one of the Plazas and watched the fireworks. It was nice, and we were already tired, so we didn´t stay in town to party, and just went back to our B&B (which was really not the best one in town).

On the first day of this year we got up late and then we went white water rafting. It was really great!!! This time, since we did that in Austria as well, I was really not nervus or afraid of falling into the water, although there were a lot more rapids than when we were in Austria, coz I knew what I have to do to get along. It was really fun! The river is really fast and brown from the soil there, and the mountains around it are all brown and dry, since it´s in the middle of the desert.

The next day we did a little trip with a group to the wineries around Mendoza, and we met two nice guys to spend the day with. The wine was nice, and we also visited an olive oil factory.

The last day in Mendoza we took another trip with a group and went towards the mountains, to see some known spots, and above all to see the Aconcagua, the highest mountain in the Americas. It was a great day and a great trip, really worth it. The views were amazing, we went up to 3100 meters above see level, and altough in the middle of the desert, on the Chilian border in summer- it was really chilly.

After that we took a night bus to Bariloche, in Patagonia. The view change a lot on the way. At night, from the bus we saw an amazing thunder storm from far, and millions of stars.
Bariloche is a really nice town, with lots of good chocolate and ice cream and local beer. We spent the night in a really nice hostel on the lake, and the next day took our own car and drove around it all over the national park Nahuel Huapi. The amount of water around here is unbelievable, and the views are simply divine. So much green, and so much just nature.

On the next day, after driving around the whole park almost, we went for a hike on a peninsula, that took us the whole day. It was really nice walking in the woods on a half island.

I gotta go, so I´ll continue another time, promise!!!

Have a nice weekend!